Week the Fourth

... totally had an English fast yesterday. Worst idea I've ever had. I couldn't say anything beyond, "I am God's lion," and, "You're going to hell." Even more obnoxious was that I ran into my trek baby, Chad Squires, and I couldn't say a word to him apart from, "Osakhamnida." Which it was. Fail.

So yeah, still...Korean.

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Hey family, it's been great to hear from you.

I really appreciate all the letters you send, but the last one was especially awesome. Six pages. Thats what I call a letter! I'm glad you guys didn't come to see me after the devotional. I would have been distracted and homesick for a while after, but I love you and I'm glad you got to see my beautiful face. That's "my faces" for mom. One of the few potential advantages of almost dying on a slip and slide is the abilty to see more of me at a time. It's also really good to hear about my friends, since they are doing a woefully bad job of letting me know about themselves.

Thats right, assorted nonrelated reader. I'm talking about you.

Cheering Jaybear on.... when he decides he cares about something, nothing can stop him from getting it done. Also fun to hear about Megan and Savannah. Megan's letter gave me hope, while Savannah's filled me with gut wrenching terror, but of the sort that is morbidly fascinating. I read about her issues understanding people, and I'm like, "My life."

Which reminds me: totally had an English fast yesterday. Worst idea I've ever had. I couldn't say anything beyond, "I am God's lion," and, "You're going to hell." Even more obnoxious was that I ran into my trek baby, Chad Squires, and I couldn't say a word to him apart from, "Osakhamnida." Which it was. Fail.

So yeah, still...Korean.

Anyways, the devotional/broadcast thing last weekend was pretty great, for the most part. The choir/ missionaries were incredibly disappointing to me. We didn't have enough seats for people, and only people who have been here for as long or longer than me were supposed to go, but instead we had a mob of thousands literally running across the campus to get a seat. It was dispicable. I hung back, was responsible about stuff, and that ended up paying off when one of the leaders announced that "the first shall be last and the last shall be first," before taking my tail chunk and letting us in through another set of doors. The bretheren were great though. I always love how bro-y the apostles are. They walk in and everything gets all quiet, and they're giving each other highfives and waving at the crowd. My favorite part was when Elder Holland, aka the most intense (like camping) man on earth, turned around and gave us a thumbs up.

After thoughts were mostly spiritually oriented, and I don't think I'll share them, but it was interesting to hear about our missionary methods expanding. I'm actually more excited about the church tours than the internet business. Having toured my share of churches, I loved how open they were. I was able to just walk in midday and be in their holy places, and while I did, I learned a lot about other faiths (and by other faiths, I mostly mean Catholicism ---t hey are great about their churches being open). I feel like I'll be able to use those opportunities pretty well, provided I can do more than just tell people that the afterlife is going to be warm. With the internet thing, I decided that some of my language study has to go into learning to type and spell correctly, so I've been working on that. Seoul is actually a pretty tech centered mission already. Like, missionaries text investigators about stuff intstead of just calling them. So we'll probably be phased into the internet stuff pretty quick, but we'll see when I get there.

Other people I ran into this week include Elder Tyson Maag, aka Maag Sauce (though I think thats just in my head), and Sir Billiam Vaughn Honey. It was great to see both of them, and nice to finally run into someone who is going to be here after I depart.

The Will thing actually reminds me that as of this week, I used to play bass for Fiareah. I'd say we were a Creed cover band, but my roomate that created the word is actually, ironically, one of the two Creed fans on earth. Yolo?

Love ya'll.

Oh wait, thats Sophie's word for the week. The actually used and acceptable word for "ya'll" is "yariboon."

Yaribooner saranghamnida.

Whitlock out.

.............

The people of Korea, need everything I have. My god has commanded me to give everything that I have. So I'll keep moving forward, keep studying, and keep dropping to my knees til I drop for the last time if thats what it takes.

I might not have enough, but I'm not here for me. I'm here for someone much better than me. Someone who has it all. Someone who cast everything under his foot until the last enemy he destroyed was death itself. How, then, can I fail?

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...My district has discovered my lack of photogeneity. Mostly because I told them that I lack photogeneity. So they are determined to take a good picture of me. So far, nothing good looking, but we've had some hilarious ones. Most are spontaneous, but when I catch people I'll usually break out my lion face or my mouse face. Osakhamnida. This trend carried over when during the Sunday night devotional I was caught on camera. I popped mouse face out of instinct, then realized (erroneously) that Elder Ricky Stephenson was probably watching from the East Campus (Wyview).

Speaking of Ricky, he should be in Texas by now, but I didn't get to see him. Nor did his wardy, Bevard Chamaenim (sister, titles come after names), so we assumed that he was out of reach on the West Campus. Sorrow.

I also haven't seen Tyson Maag yet, although I can't remember where he is going on his mission or in which MTC he's being trained, so I might not get to see him after all.

I have run into ConCon (ahem, scuse me) Elder Breinholt though. Actually, since he's in my zone and lives two rooms over, it would be osakhamnida if I hadn't. He and his entire district are going to Seoul South, but they're about the only ones besides my zone leader. The wave I'm in is full of Seoul and Taejon missionaries with a smattering of Pousin missionaries, but almost no Seoul Southers. Not gonna lie, the first time Korean spilled from my mouth and into ConCon's lap without him knowing what was happening was a huge confidence booster. He let me know that Jayden had put his papers in and whatnot, so congrats to Jaybear! La Chaim! (Not Korean. Watch Fiddler on the Roof)

I can't remember if I already told you this or not, but one of the Sisters in my group is Australian. As such, there's been more than a little good old fashioned 'Murican pride floating around the Archdistrict. Also, in the gym there are a couple of rowing machines where you can have races. The Australian sister found out about them and got really excited and convinced us all to enter a rowing machine tournament....

Anyways, we set up the tournament for our district of 12 (8 elders, 4 sisters) in three divisions of single elimination progression. Sort of March Madness-esque. The big three winners from each district would then have to compete in double elimination duels. Fortunately, Sister Australia was up against Captain Protein who was able to thouraghly maintain America's record of superiority. We only ended up getting to the big three so far and I'm one of them, as is my companion and Captain Protein. Spoiler alert: I had by far the easiest bracket, so I will not win anymore. Call it the gift of prophecy if you must.

We also played district kickball last Saturday, partially out of a desire to overcome and/or relive memories from elementary school. It was super fun, so that will be every Saturday I think.

Also, coming up is some sort of hardcore missionary training broadcast from the first presidency/quorum of the twelve to the world. As part of that, I'll be singing in a choir of 1300ish missionaries and 1100 members. You can play "Find the Whitlock" with that if you watch. Also with a picture that I'll try to send later today.

Thanks for all the letters and the love.

Thought for the week: Never give up. Never surrender.

Whenever I listen to someone speak in Korean and I think to myself, ".............................." it sort of sucks. To compensate I've been channeling Naruto. When he's faced with a situation where to save his brother he has to face a nearly unbeatable enemy and someone tells him to turn back and save himself he says something to the effect of:

If he stands in my way, I'll beat him down.

If he cuts off my arms, I'll kick him down.

If he cuts off my legs, I'll bite him down.

If he cuts off my head, I'll stare him down.

And if he kills me, I'll curse him from my grave.

But I will not back down.

So that's where I'm at now. The people of Korea, need everything I have. My god has commanded me to give everything that I have. So I'll keep moving forward, keep studying, and keep dropping to my knees til I drop for the last time if thats what it takes.

I might not have enough, but I'm not here for me. I'm here for someone much better than me. Someone who has it all. Someone who cast everything under his foot until the last enemy he destroyed was death itself. How, then, can I fail?

Whitlock out.

Awkwardlynotmorninganymore Report

Hey all!

I'm acclamated to the MTC fully now. This is no longer the time when the sun blares through my window and I defiantly lay in bed just to spite it. This is the time where I've been awake for two and a half hours (we wake up early on P-days) after sleeping for threeish. My home is no longer my house in Highland, or even my "living accomodations," it is my classroom, where I live for 11ish hours every day. 7 of that is direct classroom instruction with teachers, but the rest is my personal or companionship study. One thing that some of us have instituted (to the apparent disgust of some of the others) is a time during additional study to talk about what we learned during personal study. It's a great way to learn a lot in a little bit of time, and it helps to keep us focused on Christ when we seem to be drowning in Korean.

A couple fun Korean tidbits: they use two different number systems for different things. Chinese numbers are actually super easy to pick up and they're used for things like dates, page numbers and minutes, but Korean numbers were probably birthed by the devil himself and they are used for things like direct counting and hours. Because it makes sense to split time telling between two languages. Naturally.

Actually no. It's because they hate me personally.

Also, thanks to Emily Juchau, who inadvertanly allowed me to learn the word for "to write". It looks like an awkward frog face (^_^ with the eyes not separated by the mouth), which I connect with the pervy sage from Naruto, which I connect to Emily, which I connect to writing.....as sad as it is, this is how I've picked up most of what I know. Long chains of gibberish.

The Archdistrict is still doing great. We are essentially the greatest. We took a bit of time while we were winding down to decide which of us would take which roles in movies like Star Trek, Les Miserables, and the Avengers. I'm Captain Kirk, Thenardier (sp?), and Iron Man respectively, if you were curious.

The latest bit of drama is that the room next to us refuses to follow the rules about quiet time and lights out. I'm an insomniac anyway, but the rest of the guys in my room are kept up every night. My biggest issue is that I feel that when they do this every night it is more of a rebellion thing and less of a mistake. The short version of the story is that we had enough a couple nights ago and went over to resolve the issue. My roomate led off by asserting that we didn't care if they followed the rules or not but that they should be considerate of those of us who are. That wasn't far enough for me, so I jumped in and informed them that I cared whether they kept the rules or not, because they had no right to represent Jesus Christ when they were doing x,y, and z. I'm summarizing of course. Then I told them to shape up and went to sleep. The good news is that they went to sleep. The bad news is that in the room were two district leaders and a zone leader, some of whom took offense at my chastisement. I'm expecting some sort of disciplinary action any time now, so I'll keep you posted.

No major spiritual breakthroughs this week, but I've learned plenty of great proverbs from my dokbanja (companion).

Zac, your cookies were fantastic. I'm saving the last three, but the first bunch went fast. SO good.

Sophie, the words for today are Saja (lion), sheen (which is the ghost part of holy ghost, but doesn't really translate), and pur (fire). We have combined them into a Korean falsehood of the Sajasheen pur (Fire Lion Ghost) as a sort of mascot. It competes for our love with the all English Trocotopusus Rex (which is a tree with eight tiny t-rex arms protruding from it). Another good one is neh, which means yes. A motto of my district is to keep calm and "neh" (which means yes) when we don't know what is happening.

If anyone else is reading this and you are not part of my family, send me a letter NOW. Time goes differently for people in and out of the MTC (and I'm assuming on a real mission too). Outside, two weeks is whatever, but in here in genuinely feels like we've been here for months. We look at what we did in the morning and it feels like it was a couple days ago. Not complaining at all, I really have had a great experience here, but any letters are appreciated.

Also, happy birthday and fathers day to my mom and dad respectively! You are great parents and I love hearing from you.

Daumehpehpgaysumnida!
(See you next time. Figuratively. The figuratively being implied.)

Elder Whitlock, alive and well in the MTC

"living accommodations", 6:49 a.m. in MTC

The "Archdistrict" (Elder Whitlock: middle, back)

Cool Companion, Elder Pratt

with the district

The Archdistrict at Provo Temple. "Essentially the greatest"

The Morning Report

If I could leave you all with some sort of message, I would encourage you to be better at forgiveness than I am. I know from ample personal experience that if we let grudges fester inside of us, no matter how justified those grudges may be, we are the ones that are hurt. We are cut off from the spirit and stranded in a wasteland of our own hate, a hate that no one feels but us. We need to trust that God is a just God, that he knows better than we do, and that in the end, all will be well.

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Ok, Zac and Sophie literally made me laugh out loud. The idea of some punk kid getting chewed out by Roy sounds hilarious! Sorry about the yard, but at the same time it is sort of worth it for me.

I feel like I'm putting what I can into the language, but I'm still behind most of my class. Remembering random vocab that I can throw into sentences is easy enough, but I struggle with phrases, grammar, conjugation, and dipthongs. Which, as you may have guessed, has solicited a decently high amount of jokes from me.

Ok, so I'm still me right? When we decided on character titles for ourselves (no worries, we follow rules and call each other Chongnonim (elder), but we wanted to set things in order) I was given the title of the Joker. Less for my psychopathology and sadism and more because, lets face it, I'm hilarious. Especially when people are quick and can pick up on what I'm saying. Which my district is. We've been told that we live in the Celestial Branch, but that sort of makes my district the Archdistrict. We kick...something appropriate. Other nicknames include the One Downer (my companion), Captain Protein, the Socialist, the Pur (not a perfect transition but I don't know how to type in Korean. Means fire), Ginger, and the Australian. Anyways, I am still the guy crossing the line to the pleasure of everyone else in the room.

Don't think that I'm not taking my job here seriously. We follow the rules to a T. (Which makes sense how? Is there some sort of silent "t" in rules that I've just always forgot to put in there? English makes about as much sense as Korean sometimes.)

The last week has been one of the most spiritual in my entire life. I don't always feel the spirit, but he's never more than a query away. I've recieved a lot of revelation, ranging from life changers to the minor practical things. In fact, I've sort of been running on the Spirit. I haven't been able to get to sleep very well for the past few days. What usually happens is we'll turn the lights off at 10:30 and everyone will go to sleep besides me. I'm laying on my bed tossing, turning, cramping, and thinking. Often my thoughts are turned to murdurous topics surrounding one of my roomates clocks that ticks all night long. It really is just a tick-tocky sort of sound, but after the first hour and a half it sounds more like Kim just got kidnapped again in 24.

The surprising thing is that despite an average of 4ish hours of sleep for the last week, I'm still functioning like normal. Better even, because of my closeness with the spirit.

I will share one quick revelation I recieved. For the past couple years, there has been someone that I hated so deeply I could feel it in my bones. More recently, that hatred intensified as new information came to my attention. And that waste of flesh is coming here soon enough. After what he did, I didn't think I could restrain myself if I saw him. When he came into my mind, I completely lost the spirit for an hour. I felt empty and hollow, except for a fire that I didn't think I could contain. How could someone who doesn't deserve to walk anymore dare to walk into people's homes and ask them to live the better life? But I needed the spirit back. I needed the fire put out so that I could do what I came here to do. So I spent ten minutes just praying that somehow God would take away my rage, somehow fix the problem or at least move it to the back of my mind so I could focus on my studies and teaching. Instead, I actually heard words in my head for the first time. If you were at my talk, you heard me describe how I recieve revelation and it had nothing to do with words. I would (and still largely do) ask yes or no questions and hope for spiritual confirmation. This time, the Lord told me, "Josh, it is not given unto you to hate. Vengeance is mine. All is well." With that chastisement, I felt the spirit flow back into me and I was at peace for the first time that hour.

If I could leave you all with some sort of message, I would encourage you to be better at forgiveness than I am.
I know from ample personal experience that if we let grudges fester inside of us, no matter how justified those grudges may be, we are the ones that are hurt. We are cut off from the spirit and stranded in a wasteland of our own hate, a hate that no one feels but us. We need to trust that God is a just God, that he knows better than we do, and that in the end, all will be well.

In answer to various queries, on P-days, "when [I'm] not prepping" is a false notion. Laundry takes an hour and a half or so to do, we are required to work out everyday (although we can't use the gym on P-days, so I'm forced to die---I mean run), and after lunch we have a two and a half hour block for temple attendance, after which we go back to a normal day. I try to write letters and whatnot in between all of that, and when that isn't happening, chances are I'm studying for something else.

For food here, there are three main course options, plus salad bars, a leftover stand, and as many drinks as you can imagine. 

In an attempt to maintain some semblance of health, every morning I'm back on my college ration of Raisen Bran. Lets just say it keeps more than just the Spirit flowing, yeah? Plus I hate it and it is pretty healthy, so I don't really get a lot of it. The other two meals I don't care so much what I eat as I do how much I eat. I limit myself to one main dish, one treat thing, and juices for drinks. I get one cup of chocolate milk with breakfast as a reward for Raisen Bran. They offer basically anything that you can desire, but I think they just cycle on a weekly basis, so I might end up hating the food here. But that day is not this day.

Brenden, good luck with the beach body. Zac, I think it's crazy that you played that many games. I'm sure you did awesome. Sophie, get feeling better and this week if you want to learn a fun Korean word, then my favorite of today is Ohsakhamnida, which roughly translates as awkward.

Thanks for all the love and support, please send letters via mail or whatever you can, and I'll be back next week :)

Daumey gaypepsumnida! (See you next time!)

Whitlock out.